The Amazing Mom

One time I met a lady who was probably one of the coolest ladies I had ever met. She was hilarious, for one thing, and LOVED KIDS, so you know I was a fan right away. When we took Nico to church (Nico was our boy before Gabey...) she didn't bat an eye. She took him in and called him a Fitz and loved him like no other. After he went home with his bio-fam and I was D for DONE she didn't bat an eye at that either.  Certain I would never have another foster-child in our home, I was one day shy of throwing in the towel. No joke, I had lunch with a friend and confided that I would not be fostering again and THE VERY NEXT DAY we got the call for the Gabers (then Tristan), and -obviously- we said yes.  God is funny like that.

Back to the lady at church...

We took our tiny Gabey to church and this sweet lady didn't bat an eye. She scooped him up, called him a Fitz and loved him like no other. And then, one day, she told me she had been a mom who gave a child up for adoption once. And from that moment on I have prayed that Gabe's mom would end up just like her. 

I talk to Gabe about his bio-mom every now and then, and tell him how courageous she was. How she was brave in the face of adversity. How she loved, LOVED to hold him and talk to him. I tell him these things at random times so that it'll never be news to him. He'll grow up knowing he came from a mother who wanted a life abundant for him,  having had an extremely difficult life herself and, as a result, made extremely bad choices. I never excuse her behavior, but I do qualify it with the history of her past. 

And when I bring her up I always, always, tell him my prayer is that God has snatched her out of what she considers normal and thrusted her into a new life, and that He has adopted her.

My prayer is that Jesus Christ has radically changed her life, just like he's changed mine, and that sweet lady's at church, who knows what it's like to chose a life above your own. Who was brave in the face of adversity.

I do not, for one second, doubt God's ability to radically change Gabe's bio-mom's life. I do not doubt that God can break her addiction and heal her spirit. I do not doubt that somewhere she could be serving in a church, rocking babies and loving on them like they're her own. 

It is rare, but it happens, a woman will tell she's given up a baby for adoption. And it takes me all of a second to tell her she's amazing. SHE IS AMAZING. The bravery, the courage, the selflessness, the humility... the trust... it is not lost on me. 

To that super cool lady who loves my babies no matter if they've come from my body or not, and is deeply aware of the entire adoption story - you are amazing. 

To Gabe's bio-mom - (We changed his name, #sorrynotsorry) you are amazing. I do not know for sure that it was your choice, but we had that moment, on the last day I saw you, that moment when you wanted more for him, and we both know it. I'm praying God has snatched you by now, and, if not yet, then VERY SOON.

To anyone who has made that life-altering, nausea-inducing, valiantly humble choice for a life abundant - you are amazing.

And I will forever be in your corner.