Oh the Bliss!

I was hanging out with a sweet first time mom and her baby girl not long ago, and if there is anything I love to do it is hang out with first time moms. I LOVE it!! I love it because, for an hour or two, I live vicariously through them and swoon with envy because there is nothing like your first baby . It is an insanely precious time, and as many kids as I have I will always look back at those first two years with Ben and hold them tightly because that time, when it's just you and the baby for hours and hours and hours each day, you never get that time again if you have more kids. Obviously I'm a fan of having more than one child, but, *insert huge sigh*, those only child days were priceless. They were also mind-blowingly terrifying. Because I knew nothing. Zilch. I had a rough idea of some things, but to actually apply them to a real live, breathing, moving, potentially  screaming  kid was a whole different story. Oh but when they're babies you get to love on ...

I'm not out to get you. I'm not here to make you miserable. I'm not here to make you feel oppressed, or small, and I don't look for ways to take the wind from your sails. I make roughly 8,000 decisions a day, give or take, and I only let you in on maybe 4 or 5 of them. From the time I wake up to the time I fall asleep (and sometimes even  while  I sleep) I am weighing options and considering every angle and praying for wisdom. I have never, ever thought to myself, "which option will tick you off the most?" and picked it, not once. And I never will.  I think about the time of day, what you've had to eat, how much sleep you've had, how many minutes you've spent in front of a screen, how many words on a page you've read, if you've been outside enough, if you've been outside too much, your helpfulness, your honesty, your interests, your influences, your influence , your heart. I think about who I know you to be, and who God is gro...