Oh the Bliss!

Have you ever said to your kids, "I bet you'd take better care of your toys if you only had one."? I've said that countless times, but I shall say it no more! I was talking with my older boys last night and telling them how disappointed I was in everyone's attitudes yesterday, including my own, and explaining that how we had acted was not who God wants us to be. That scary, selfish, yelling mommy? Nope, not who God made me. But I was finding myself acting out of those characteristics more often than living out the qualities God has graciously given for me to live in because of the Holy Spirit living in me. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, self control... I was hardly showing any fruits of the Spirt in my parenting which is incredibly tragic. What's my deal? What is it that triggers the wrath of Monster Mom? Mess. Everywhere. Mess. TICKS. ME. OFF. Clearly I failed in teaching the concept of cleaning up after ones self ...

What is UP with wheat field pictures???? Good grief, they are everywhere. People get engaged, BAM! Let's lay in a wheat field and snap some shots. People get married, WHAM! What's more romantic than frolicking in some dry brush? Album cover needed for your break out solo career? Nothing says, "I play really good music" like a portrait taken in tall grass and shrubbery. (Throw in some feathers and you're sure to have a hit.) Oh I know, (last one I promise), let's put a couch in the middle of the wheat field and get the whole family to pose like this is totally normal because doesn't EVERY family spend their sweet time lounging around in a big ol' sea of golden grain? ***I'm sorry, so so sorry, if you and/or your family have taken such pictures, and/or been the photographer of such. I truly am not trying to make you feel lousy, and I still want you to send me your Christmas cards, I just am ready for the next great photo backdrop.*** I think the rea...

It's been almost three weeks since Nicolas came home to us. Home... I wonder if he feels like it's his home? I don't know, but what I do know is how gracious and merciful our God is. I know many, many people have been praying for him and for us. I know this because he has changed, our hearts have changed, in only ways that God can do. People adapt, get used to things, but God radically changes, and redesigns. Nico claps his hands now. And dances with us during our crazy dance parties. He sleeps almost the entire night without crying out more than a brief moment maybe once. He puts his shoes away where they belong. He comes to me when I call for him, and he clings to me when we are in new places. Those may not seem like a big deal because moms we know live to see their little ones clap their hands. We all flip out and call grandma when the baby points to it's nose on command for the first time. But when you're a baby growing up in an adult world then you don't h...

I wish I could show his picture. He's super cute, with big brown eyes and mismatching ears. He's huge - younger than Mia but the size of Troy. Addie calls him "Honey Bear" which is really rather fitting. Tonight I was holding him in church and as I sang the songs and heard our God's name worshiped I cried, could this be the first time Nico has heard the Lord's name adored and praised instead shouted and cursed? From the moment we got him I've been telling him how important he is, how much Jesus loves him, how needed he is, how precious he is, how safe he is. I'm kind of blown away by it all right now, but I knew I just had to get something down so I wouldn't forget these first feelings. Precious.