What a Difference HIS Love Makes...

It's been almost three weeks since Nicolas came home to us. Home... I wonder if he feels like it's his home? I don't know, but what I do know is how gracious and merciful our God is. I know many, many people have been praying for him and for us. I know this because he has changed, our hearts have changed, in only ways that God can do. People adapt, get used to things, but God radically changes, and redesigns.

Nico claps his hands now. And dances with us during our crazy dance parties. He sleeps almost the entire night without crying out more than a brief moment maybe once. He puts his shoes away where they belong. He comes to me when I call for him, and he clings to me when we are in new places. Those may not seem like a big deal because moms we know live to see their little ones clap their hands. We all flip out and call grandma when the baby points to it's nose on command for the first time. But when you're a baby growing up in an adult world then you don't have anyone asking you where the birdies are or what a dog says. There is no stimulation so basic skills are totally lost. So yeah, it's a big deal when Nico claps his hands, and you better believe I'll be calling grandma when he waves bye-bye for the first time.

Today he called me Mama.

I won't hide the fact that felt weird. I'm not his mom, he has a mom. I felt like I was betraying her by having him call me mama. . . but Nico knows betrayal too well, so I am more than willing to be good with whatever he calls me.

I'm so amazed by God's provision for us. Blown away that He would trust us enough to care for this little one. Christians always throw around the sentiment, "You might be the only Jesus that person ever sees." but when that person is sleeping in your house, watching your every move, holding your hand, it takes on a whole new meaning.

Speaking of accountable, it doesn't take much more than a little child who has seen violence to curb my level of anger and attitude towards my kids. I'm ashamed it took me this long...

It's going well, better than expected I would say. There is a looooooooooooong road ahead. It is one with blind curves and dips and hills. It's ain't pretty, and this might be one of the few peppy posts you get from me. But, it's like Mark always says, we're just here to serve and glorify God. Amen? Peppy or not, I'm just here to serve.

Comments

domesticjoys said…
I love your heart sweet friend! You challenge me in more ways than you know! Keep loving all the precious, snotty nosed, dancing kids that God has so perfectly for you!
Laura said…
Love it!!!! Love it!!! Love your family, your desire to be more like Christ everyday and the fact that you are sharing your heart with soooo many more people then you know!!!
Jim said…
It is not about us. It is about HIM. That is what I keep reminding myself and you did that so well in the post. Keep the focus as you continue on the journey and maybe we will meet him at the Grand Park one day!
Heather said…
So amazing! Making a difference, one child at a time.

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