The Addy Behind Addie

Every now and then I catch a glimpse of him, the original Addison, in my Addison.

Oh wait.

Maybe you don't know how my Addison's name came to be? Maybe we've only known each other a few months, instead of a decade, and you think maybe I got her name from the character in Grey's Anatomy. (If you had to google Grey's Anatomy you are my new best friend.)

No, she was not named after the former wife of "Dr. McDreamy". (Again, if you had to google that, I love you.)

She was named after a different talent.

A playwright.

A director.

A brilliant actor, yes.

But not that Addison.

I walked into his house at the invitation of a mutual friend for a Bible study. It was held there, I learned, so that he -Addison- didn't have to leave his home.

The study leader asked a question and I answered it and Addison challenged me. We engaged in biblical banter for a few minutes until one one of us folded (I refuse to believe it was me, though I bet he would beg to differ) and after that brief exchanged we were hooked. I stared across the room into the eyes of the most intriguing boy/man I had ever met. His skin was so pale I could almost see through it. His eyes were so big. He laughed at me with the largest laugh. He held my stare and smirked, not to be outwitted by the new girl he rolled his eyes and looked away... then he asked for my number.

It never crossed my mind that he was THAT kind of sick.

I thought maybe he wasn't a fan of the sun. Maybe he was recovering from a seriously bad cold or flu. Maybe he just really loved his family and never wanted to go out. But when our mutual friend said the word no 20 year old can fully comprehend I don't think it even registered with me that he was really sick.

We went to Disneyland, and as I cut in and out of the crowds he struggled to keep up. I would stand longer, dance harder, and he would back down, and bow out. And I had no clue. Then our friend pulled me aside and explained. Addison was really, REALLY, sick.

Then cancer became no joke.

 It became the monster consuming my new friend before I even had a chance to find out his favorite color. It became the thief that was stealing days and hours and minutes, precious minutes, away from this sweet love. And as it took over his body I pressed harder into our friendship. Addison became my nearest and dearest. When home visits became City of Hope visits I didn't bat an eye. He was my people, I and his. And visiting hours didn't apply.

We would go back and forth with funny kid names... Bubba held the #1 spot. Then one night I made a promise that one of my children would wear his name - most likely a daughter, seeing as how Addison is clearly a girl's name, we laughed and he agreed. And I locked it away in my heart.

Addison Glines was an intricate part of my soul when I was 20. He forced me to look at life and death and stake a claim in what I believe. He had no fear. He was so confident, annoyingly confident, really. He was witty, and charming, kind, loving, compassionate, crazy sarcastic, loved Jesus, and for a few brief breaths he was my very best friend.

I was picking up my roommate from her job at Fashion Island when my phone would not stop ringing. I ignored the first few, then answered the last.

My heart stopped. I stopped breathing.  I looked at my roommate and couldn't say a word. She, intuitive and precious to me as she was, told me to pull over, to let her drive, as I sat with the weight of the news. I collapsed.

Six years and a lifetime later I held my firstborn daughter in my arms, stared at her pale white skin and big eyes, kissed her forehead, and named her  Addison Sarah.


Addison /Addie/ Addy: Excellent, Noble. 

My Addie is kind, loving, compassionate, clever, witty, and pretty much all things wonderful. She talks of life and death and she reminds me to stake my claim in Jesus Christ. She has her daddy's baby blues, her nana's dimples, her gma's nose, her mama's wit, and my dear friend's precious name. 


"I thank my God in all my remembrance of you, 
always in every prayer of mine for you all making my prayer with joy... And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." 
Phil 1:3, 4 & 6







Comments

Jean said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Caroline said…
You´re just a wonderfull writer. Every post you do, I read, and cry, and laugh! Thanks for being so honest about your life, your heart, and your path with Jesus. thanks for bringing me to the cross!! God bless you and your beautiful family.
Your sister in Christ, Caroline
Greetings since Argentina

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