What's She Up to NOW?
Have you ever said to your kids, "I bet you'd take better care of your toys if you only had one."? I've said that countless times, but I shall say it no more!
I was talking with my older boys last night and telling them how disappointed I was in everyone's attitudes yesterday, including my own, and explaining that how we had acted was not who God wants us to be. That scary, selfish, yelling mommy? Nope, not who God made me. But I was finding myself acting out of those characteristics more often than living out the qualities God has graciously given for me to live in because of the Holy Spirit living in me. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, self control... I was hardly showing any fruits of the Spirt in my parenting which is incredibly tragic.
What's my deal? What is it that triggers the wrath of Monster Mom?
Mess.
Everywhere.
Mess.
TICKS. ME. OFF.
Clearly I failed in teaching the concept of cleaning up after ones self to my children, I can own this. And clearly I'm not being consistent enough in disciplining my children for not honoring property and not honoring me by cleaning up said property, that's a little harder to own, but I'll do it.
This morning I was on the verge of losing it... I could feel it building up as I looked from one room to another, to another. Stuff everywhere. And as I started to pray the fruits of the Spirit over my thoughts and quickly heating heart, praise the Lord, I took a step back and said, "If the mess is what is really the matter, I can easily do something about that."
So I told them to pick one toy they'd like to keep out, and everything else was being bagged or boxed. Ben, predictably, chose a Lego set, which we deemed "one toy". Addison (the true collateral damage in this mass chastisement) - after clarifying that her blanket was not a toy - chose the little tiny plastic figurine in her hand at that moment. Troy chose nothing, which I wasn't surprised about because he doesn't really hold anything as sacred and pretty much spends his days following Ben and Addison around doing whatever they do. Mia chose a horse, I helped her with that. Nicolas got a ball. Pretty much everything else was bagged. It didn't even take that long. There was no crying, no whining, in fact I'd say there was almost a sense of WHEW... that's better.
All books stayed.
All craft paper and crafty things stayed - but are out of reach and will need permission before use.
All outside toys stayed.
I personally like when they play with Tinker Toys and Playmobile sets, so those stayed up on a shelf and can be asked for.
I'll be getting rid of hopefully %80 of it, and they'll have the opportunity to earn or buy back some of their favorite things. (I'm betting they forget about nearly all of it, as they have in the past when I've done a clean sweep of things).
As I mentioned, Addison was sort of lumped into a mess that she didn't necessarily belong in. Though the girl hordes like no other, she does have a few special items that she takes very good care of, it was hard for me to put those away. Since I knew, though she didn't say, she regretted her choice of keeper toy, this afternoon I asked if she'd like to take out her "Big Eyed Monkey" instead. That pretty much made her LIFE. Oh, she also kept her back-scratcher - which we also deemed "not a toy". (Love that Nana!)
The beauty of all of this was at lunch when we were talking about the morning and I was able to pull the Bible in and teach the kids about our God who loves order.1 Corinthians 14:33 says, "for God is not a God of disorder but one of peace..." How all over His Word we learn about people He blessed with things and when they abused that blessing He took it away - or gave some sort of consequence. "Everyone to whom much was given, of him much will be required..." (Luke 12:48) and I'm pretty sure the "much will be required" includes taking very good care of what has been given.
Ben made a profound connection when he said, "Kind of like Nico's parents. God gave them Nico and they made some bad decisions and didn't take care of him like they should have so God took Nico away." Pretty right on...
Which full-circled it back to me getting to say, "And aren't you glad God is teaching you this lesson right now with toys, instead of when you're an adult with a baby?"
Our afternoon? We PLAYED! Outside, make believe, building forts and lots of dancing. And when it was time for dinner and bed - there was NOTHING to clean up.
So there you go! Our life with little (and yet still so, SO much) begins. Let's revisit this in a week and see what's become of this new way, shall we??
I was talking with my older boys last night and telling them how disappointed I was in everyone's attitudes yesterday, including my own, and explaining that how we had acted was not who God wants us to be. That scary, selfish, yelling mommy? Nope, not who God made me. But I was finding myself acting out of those characteristics more often than living out the qualities God has graciously given for me to live in because of the Holy Spirit living in me. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, self control... I was hardly showing any fruits of the Spirt in my parenting which is incredibly tragic.
What's my deal? What is it that triggers the wrath of Monster Mom?
Mess.
Everywhere.
Mess.
TICKS. ME. OFF.
Clearly I failed in teaching the concept of cleaning up after ones self to my children, I can own this. And clearly I'm not being consistent enough in disciplining my children for not honoring property and not honoring me by cleaning up said property, that's a little harder to own, but I'll do it.
This morning I was on the verge of losing it... I could feel it building up as I looked from one room to another, to another. Stuff everywhere. And as I started to pray the fruits of the Spirit over my thoughts and quickly heating heart, praise the Lord, I took a step back and said, "If the mess is what is really the matter, I can easily do something about that."
So I told them to pick one toy they'd like to keep out, and everything else was being bagged or boxed. Ben, predictably, chose a Lego set, which we deemed "one toy". Addison (the true collateral damage in this mass chastisement) - after clarifying that her blanket was not a toy - chose the little tiny plastic figurine in her hand at that moment. Troy chose nothing, which I wasn't surprised about because he doesn't really hold anything as sacred and pretty much spends his days following Ben and Addison around doing whatever they do. Mia chose a horse, I helped her with that. Nicolas got a ball. Pretty much everything else was bagged. It didn't even take that long. There was no crying, no whining, in fact I'd say there was almost a sense of WHEW... that's better.
All books stayed.
All craft paper and crafty things stayed - but are out of reach and will need permission before use.
All outside toys stayed.
I personally like when they play with Tinker Toys and Playmobile sets, so those stayed up on a shelf and can be asked for.
I'll be getting rid of hopefully %80 of it, and they'll have the opportunity to earn or buy back some of their favorite things. (I'm betting they forget about nearly all of it, as they have in the past when I've done a clean sweep of things).
As I mentioned, Addison was sort of lumped into a mess that she didn't necessarily belong in. Though the girl hordes like no other, she does have a few special items that she takes very good care of, it was hard for me to put those away. Since I knew, though she didn't say, she regretted her choice of keeper toy, this afternoon I asked if she'd like to take out her "Big Eyed Monkey" instead. That pretty much made her LIFE. Oh, she also kept her back-scratcher - which we also deemed "not a toy". (Love that Nana!)
The beauty of all of this was at lunch when we were talking about the morning and I was able to pull the Bible in and teach the kids about our God who loves order.1 Corinthians 14:33 says, "for God is not a God of disorder but one of peace..." How all over His Word we learn about people He blessed with things and when they abused that blessing He took it away - or gave some sort of consequence. "Everyone to whom much was given, of him much will be required..." (Luke 12:48) and I'm pretty sure the "much will be required" includes taking very good care of what has been given.
Ben made a profound connection when he said, "Kind of like Nico's parents. God gave them Nico and they made some bad decisions and didn't take care of him like they should have so God took Nico away." Pretty right on...
Which full-circled it back to me getting to say, "And aren't you glad God is teaching you this lesson right now with toys, instead of when you're an adult with a baby?"
Our afternoon? We PLAYED! Outside, make believe, building forts and lots of dancing. And when it was time for dinner and bed - there was NOTHING to clean up.
So there you go! Our life with little (and yet still so, SO much) begins. Let's revisit this in a week and see what's become of this new way, shall we??
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