Comments
I know that people come from good places and the intentions behind their comments are never bad, and sometimes they're actually funny, but sometimes I just want to say, um, really? Is that the BEST thing you can think of to say? Here are some of my faves from last week...
"I'm going to un-friend you on facebook because you do not look like you just had a baby a week ago." - sorry?
"What's her name? ... Oh I know SO MANY Mia's. Like, SO many." - great.
"Are you guys finished yet? Is there some literature out there I can get for you (to teach you about prevention)?"
(This one is my favorite) - "I'm the oldest of three and I am SO glad my parent's didn't have a fourth." - um... okay.
This is the one I hear from almost everyone, it's not necessarily a bad thing to say, I just get it A LOT, "Two boys and two girls? Oh, the perfect family." Does that mean before Mia we had an imperfect family?
I also hear endless comments on how much hair she has. This doesn't bother me at all, especially if it comes from a newer friend who never saw my other kids as babies. But come on friends, my babies are hairy, this is nothing new. A bald baby - now THAT would be something to comment on.
Oh, and just to give all y'all a little heart attack... I saw a very pregnant girl walking the other day and I totally sighed, Awwwh, with a hint of envy in it. I think I will always have that longing, which is why I can't ever say for 100% certain yes or no when people ask me if we're done, which everyone does. Duggars we are not, but "done" just seems so final. Maybe it's because that's what has defined me for 5 years, being pregnant. If I'm not pregnant or mothering an infant, than who am? Yikes! I think we've entered another blog topic...
"I'm going to un-friend you on facebook because you do not look like you just had a baby a week ago." - sorry?
"What's her name? ... Oh I know SO MANY Mia's. Like, SO many." - great.
"Are you guys finished yet? Is there some literature out there I can get for you (to teach you about prevention)?"
(This one is my favorite) - "I'm the oldest of three and I am SO glad my parent's didn't have a fourth." - um... okay.
This is the one I hear from almost everyone, it's not necessarily a bad thing to say, I just get it A LOT, "Two boys and two girls? Oh, the perfect family." Does that mean before Mia we had an imperfect family?
I also hear endless comments on how much hair she has. This doesn't bother me at all, especially if it comes from a newer friend who never saw my other kids as babies. But come on friends, my babies are hairy, this is nothing new. A bald baby - now THAT would be something to comment on.
Oh, and just to give all y'all a little heart attack... I saw a very pregnant girl walking the other day and I totally sighed, Awwwh, with a hint of envy in it. I think I will always have that longing, which is why I can't ever say for 100% certain yes or no when people ask me if we're done, which everyone does. Duggars we are not, but "done" just seems so final. Maybe it's because that's what has defined me for 5 years, being pregnant. If I'm not pregnant or mothering an infant, than who am? Yikes! I think we've entered another blog topic...
Comments
Your existence may not revolve around being preggers any more... but your role as a mother is here to stay and those kids are blessed more than they can imagine for you to have that role in their lives.
I think about how amazing God feels to be a Father in our lives. I pray you feel that same feeling in your kids lives. Love you friend!
The little stuff I try to let roll off my back and extend some grace (because I know I have put my foot in my mouth WAY more than once).
Thanks for letting me think through it all and sharing your heart. It will be exciting to see what God has in store for your family (and mine too as we make some of those same decisions) ;)
--Beth
And I have to come to my own babies rescues here....a baby with lots of head hair, or as you say~ 'hairy'~ is sweet, but my BALD BABIES were the CUTEST and so adorable! Need I post pictures of my bald babies? Babies can't help what they have and don't have, they are all so cute. Even the ones that are so ugly they are cute! :0)
Hugs to all! :) Love ya!
second I don't know anyone else named Mia. :)
It sounds like you guys are letting God do the deciding in the number of children you have and there is no perfect number. It is interesting that you touch on your identity being found in pregnancy/mothering. I was just talking to Candie about that. Even though I've only been prego 1 time and have only been a mother for 17 months I have numerous times needed to seek God and be reminded of my significance to HIM and how I am His daughter raising Isaac to glorify him (he's on loan to me :). I would love to hear a blog or just have a conversation with you about this seeing you have have been in prego mom mode for 5 years. I always learn so much from you.
thank you so much for sharing- i cant believe these crazy, insensitive comments came during the most precious, amazing, beautiful part of life.
xoxoxox
You shouldn't feel guilty for not being done! And your children are so blessed to have each another They are also blessed to have a mommy and daddy that want them and are not "burdened" by their own children.