Oh the Bliss!

Addison was introduced to some fun family members this week : Aunt Pam (yes, her skin is really that beautiful in person. She's gorgeous.) Uncle Darren (who she sort of looks like she belongs too) Auntie Karrie (a cousin on Mark's side really, but Auntie works for us.) and fun-loving cousins Will and Kate!! What a week! It's been so beautiful everyday so we've spent hours and hours outside. Ben had a BLAST with his cousins, especially William who is just a few months older than him. They played so well together. Mark made the comment, as he, Karrie and myself sat on a blanket watching the kids, that it seems like just yesterday it was their parents sitting on a blanket watching them play. Time surely speeds up as we get older, it blows me away how fast it goes by. It was a special treat having Darren and Pam here for a conference conveniently just a few miles from our house. We got to see them, sadly no kids and no Settlers, but they are always so f...

I may have mentioned this before, but I need to jot it down again for myself.... One of my favorite times of the day is just after the kids are down for the night and I go around and collect all the toys Ben missed during his clean-up/play with all the toys you've brought out during the day time. I love these few moments for three reasons: 1.)It's so quiet. Not a lonely quiet, a peaceful quiet. 2.) It reminds me of how much fun Ben's life is and how much fun my life is because of him. 3.) It's evidence that I have kids. Little bits of proof that Mark and I have been blessed in a way that many people long for. I might complain about vacuuming (nothing has changed, mom) and mopping, but picking up toys - I think - will always be done with a little smile on my face. That's all. Just want to remember this.

I feel like I have a lot to be thankful for and I don't want to forget it all, so here it is, a throw back to the "thankful list" ~Pinky Harper and her husband who graciously watch Ben for me 2 Tuesday nights a month so I can help lead a bible study at a shelter for women with unplanned pregnancies (Casa Teresa). I have been praying for this opportunity for over a year but couldn't find a sitter for Ben and now Addison. I can't afford to pay someone that frequently, and an every other week and FREE commitment is seemingly a lot to ask of anyone... but the Lord provided. The really neat thing is this: I went the the study one time last year and although I really wanted to be there I found myself feeling awkward, uncomfortable, inadequate and I had nothing to say. This time around I've felt completely at ease. I've been able to connect with the girls where I didn't think possible and our conversations felt led instead of forced. Just goes to show that Go...

Ben smiled for a picture!! And what a cute smile it is... Love my kids!

The dress that Addison is wearing was made by my mom for me when I was a baby. This is one reason I'm thankful for having a little girl... for moments like this. P.S. Doesn't my mom look beautiful!

We had a very nice Mother's Day up in Simi with Mark's mom. Ben made me a very special card, he actually gave it too me on Saturday because I walked in on him making it and he was too excited to hide it for a day. I feel so blessed to be a mom. My favorite moments are when the four of us are together and I breathe a little easier knowing -for now- we're all under the same roof. Nothing is for certain and having my kids forever isn't guaranteed (or even the plan). But man, when the four of us roll around and wrestle and laugh and play and snuggle and just be together - that fills my heart like nothing this world can ever offer me. I'm so thankful that this is where God wants me in life, in this moment, with these two kids and this husband. As selfish as this is, I pray that God keeps me in this for many years to come. I don't think it can get much better than this.

Sitting pretty in her perch. I love the curly bath hair, wish it stayed like that after it dries. This picture is so funny to me, it doesn't even look like her. I think Ben is looking at her like "who is this crazy girl making the funny face?" Love the dimples though.

There was a triple fatal car accident on the freeway just miles from my house. A woman was driving with her three kids and their grandmother. All three kids died. It wasn't her fault, she was rear-ended by a semi. She was driving a van just like mine. My mom left me a message saying how scared and sad she was because she instantly thought of me. She knew it wasn't me and the kids, but it just hit close to home for her, and probably for every mother of a mother out there. Someone forwarded one of those "thankful for moms" emails which I usually don't read, but this paragraph caught my eye; "What makes a good Mother anyway? Is it patience? Compassion? Broad hips? The ability to nurse a baby, cook dinner, and sew a button on a shirt, all at the same time? Or is it in her heart? Is it the ache you feel when you watch your son or daughter disappear down the street, walking to school alone for the very first time? The jolt that takes you from sleep to dread, from ...

So little in that big bed! My sweet friend Amanda made the adorable blanket and pillow for me, and she's in the middle of making the bumper for me too. I love my crafty friends! PS. The garden is officially planted. Wow, this is going to be interesting to say the least.

I gon'dun planted me a garden! That's right folks, Fitzpatrick Farms will soon be up and running. I'd like to note that the truck and rake in this photo were used by Farmer Ben to help Mark with the diggin'. Also notice the luscious pumpkin plants we already have blooming. The plot might not look like much now, but by the end of this weekend we'll have planted all of the following (and I'm not making this up. This is what happens when Mark goes to the nursery for me. I love it!!): Watermelon, strawberries, eggplant, corn, spinach, lettuce, two different types of onion, carrots, three different types of tomato, cucumbers, squash, pepperoncinnis, jalapenos, basil, bananamelon (yes, I said bananamelon), some other kind of melon I can't think of the name of, soybeans, peas, and a pepper Ben picked out called chocolate something or other. I think that's everything. Laugh if you will, but come harvest time you'll be lining up for a salad fresh from our ga...

New Glasses for me, woohoo! This girl has a smile that will break hearts across America someday. Oh Ben, you are so fun. Dirty, silly, messy loads of fun. Is purple her color or what? No cavities and and new glasses! Yippee for me! I was dreading going to the dentist... I thought for sure I'd have cavities. If I have less than 5 I'll be happy is what I thought walking in the door. But look at me! Cavity free! I took Addison with me, something I would've never dreamt of doing with my 0-60 boy. She showed off her adorable self to everyone, staying sweet and content the entire time. Man I love this little girl.

Addison is asleep in her very own room. I miss her already.

POLISHING MEMORIES I have no time to sweep the floor. The piano collects dust like never before. The wastebaskets are full; there are marks on the wall. The telephone’s ringing - - - can’t take any calls. I’m sitting here rocking my tiny new son. Closing my eyes to the days work not done. I know from experience the future becomes past. These moments are treasures; I want them to last. Long after he’s grown I’ll sit in this chair and feel the soft touch of his baby fine hair. I’ll rock by this window till the first star appears, polishing the memories of my childbearing years. ~Patricia W. Hiscock This poem has been framed and sitting on my parent's piano for, I dunno, 15 years at least. There was a few years there, believe it or not, that I dabbled in the fine art of piano playing. I think I realized, however, that piano playing wasn't for me when I'd play in recitals not to show off what I had learned but for the creme puffs my teacher served afterwards. It wasn't that...

Here's a throw back to the Guest Speaker bit from the days of old. My sweet friend Ali is here tonight hanging with me and the kids while Mark is away for the weekend. So far we've had a very productive day. It's very nice being friends with an OCD case. (She told me I could write that.) We've done 5 loads of laundry, cleaned out the play room, re-did Ben's room and picked up everything that's been sitting around oh, forever. We've decided that I need a little bit more of her in me and she needs a little/A LOT of me in her. (Again, she told me I could write that.) Honestly though, Ali is dear to my heart. A faithful, kind, and generous friend whom I'm so thankful I've gotten to know much better over the last year or so. She LOVES our kids and they know it. It warms my hear to see her with them. I am extremely thankful for her friendship. So, without further ado... Ali's Thankful list... ~ the Fitzpatrick family. (hee hee, that's me) ~ church ...

... she writes me notes like this one... "every time you say to me, "Mom you'd be so proud of me....." (about something you have done or are doing)..... In my mind I am thinking, "My dear, sweet daughter, I ALREADY AM SO PROUD OF YOU!!!" And I am proud of her, too.

There is a spot on the female body which only appears after child birth that I'll refer to as the ARB or Automatic Rocking Button. The ARB allows a mother to sit with a crying, fussing, sickly or simply a cuddly baby for extended periods of time and rock, back and forth, back and forth, keeping a steady pace and rhythm while both child and mother are sound asleep. Addison abuses my ARB.

I forgot D. I did it, it was my fault. I'm sure every mother at one point forgets their child's blanket, bear, pacifier etc. right? We went to a friend's house, a place Ben had never been, with the intention of putting him to bed there. Easy enough, we've done it a thousand times before in various locations and we've never had a problem, but (and this is a big 'but') we've always had D. We didn't realize D's absence until bedtime, of course, and I sort of panicked. I was ready to drive home and get it, but Mark was confident Ben would be fine, he is, after all, a grade A sleeper. Lorin offered us a makeshift D. Yeah right, I thought, she obviously doesn't know the gravity D holds in Ben's life. I took it anyway, just to be nice. We did everything as normal. Pjs on, cup of milk, sing a song, say a prayer and put him in the pack-n-play. All was calm until his head hit the pillow. This is it, I thought, his entire sense of security stems fro...

(Stop me if I've written this before...) At the risk of jinxing this phenomenon (because I'll take good parking karma when I can get it) I have to share this somewhat frustrating/somewhat fantastic fact of my life: Where is the only parking spot when I have my kids with me at Trader Joe's? The furthest spot from the store, of course. Where is the only parking spot when I DON'T have my kids? Front row, every time. Every. Time. It kills me.

Besides Christ raising from the dead, and I'm not making small of that by any means, but besides his raising I think I found the other major reason for the season... Easter DRESSES! Nana and Papa Dan made a lovely addition, and a lovely breakfast, for our Easter morning. Favorite picture to date, I think. Oh no she didn't - OH YES I DID! How could I resist? Didi and Gma made a lovely addition, and a lovely dinner, for our Easter evening! This weekend was wonderful. We went to a fantastic Good Friday service at Mariners then we had my parents, Carrie and the kids and the Caruanas over for dinner. The thought that kept running through my head as I reflected on what Christ did on the cross was 'he did this for ME. And if I were the only one, he'd still do it for ME.' A sobering thought crossed my mind during the church service; if i were the only one on earth then I would've been the one to nail Jesus to the cross. As I thought about that it's as if I felt...

Cold and flu season officially ended on the last day of March, why is it that both Ben and I are sick NOW? Ooh, but I'm so thankful for these things... ~ Keri Stock's blog. ~ strawberry muffins I made, and they actually turned out pretty good. That's encouraging because my last few muffin attempts have been pathetic. ~my happy, healthy 11 lb 8 oz, 24" baby girl who is, as of yesterday, 2 MONTHS OLD! ~ time with my dad on Sunday. It was especially nice because he sat in the "baby" lobby with Addsion so Mark and I could go into the service. And boy, that was such a gift because the worship was AWESOME! I was so thankful to be able to really hear it and enjoy it live. (As opposed to on a tv screen in a BIG room with LOTS of babies. Not a good combo for this self-diagnosed ADD girl.) ~ a fantastic walk with Carrie and the kids. She is an inspiration because her heart is so sweet and constantly striving to show Jesus, I love that about her. ~ Joanna being in town ...